Help Your Dog Cope with being Alone
Many of us have had a very unusual year and we have found ourselves working from home for months on end. This might be fantastic news for our dogs. But they are becoming unaccustomed to being left alone. and the reality is that there will be times we need to leave our dogs at home without us.
So my advice is:
Start training for leaving the dog alone NOW.
This way you can start slower and for short times and build up the length of time your dog is left alone.
We need to train our dogs to trust that we return.
So we start with leaving for just 5 minutes. And then we return and at another point in the same day or on the next day we leave for 10 minutes... Then the following training session leave for 20 minutes. Keep doubling the time (ONLY if dog is fine for the previous length of time – otherwise slow it down and PRACTICE a lower amount of time)
When you are training your dog to be left in this way here are a few tips:
Don’t make a fuss when you leave... just give a biscuit and say goodbye.
Don’t make a fuss when you return – behave as though life is very normal and you had just popped to the loo ... I expect most of you don’t give an excited greeting to your dog everytime you emerge from the bathroom! (This non exciting leave and return takes the dog’s arousal down to a calmer space and keeps the experience of being left in a calmer part of the brain!)
Do actually leave the house (and lock the door)... Don’t just sit in another room because the dog will know the difference! – I understand that for the shorter periods it isn’t really worth going somewhere... so If it’s raining, go sit in your car or a shed or garage.. take a book with you or a board game to play in the car with the kids!
If you have a noise responsive dog or if you often have the Tv or radio on in the house... leave it on for the dog whilst you are out. It can be quite comforting to have the normal sounds around them.
And here are some other games you can be playing to help your dog be prepared for life when you return to normal activities that take you out of the home:
Play games that keep your dog at a distance
(we often want to promote close proximity at Faithful Friends but it is also valuable to help the dog learn to be independent too)
SO...
Set up a safe cardboard feeding experience where food is scattered in amongst some of your safe recycling and your dog can find the food and engage with it... whilst you sit at the other end of the garden or retreat down the hall.
Or give your dog a licky mat or a stuffed kong or a scattered snuffle mat in a different room / far across the room or the garden from you. Here's a link to get licky mats (pictured below if you dont know what one is)
Providing SAFE enriching feeding experiences away from your close proximity will help your dog not feel they need to be “with you” all the time.
Word of caution with these games at a distance: If you are still working on strengthening your recall please continue to switch this around and sometimes encourage distance whilst other times encouraging VERY close proximity... you do need to build being close to you as more valuable than being far away from you.
Also if your dog finds digging through cardboard for their scattered pieces of food frightening – don’t do it at a distance. BUT STILL DO IT... because the act of finding and picking the food out for themselves is still growing independence even if you are right next to them.
If you want access to 21 games that help your dog grow in confidence and optimism my Socialisation in Isolation course is still at the VERY KNOCKDOWN Price of £19 - this price was knockdown for lockdown and won’t remain forever!
Lastly
If your dog is particularly like Velcro and doesn’t remain away from you even for a moment you might need to take it back a notch…
Set up something as a visual barrier like an upturned coffee table or a cardboard box placed fairly near you... no instruction necessary just sit and watch your dog.
Whenever they make the choice to go the other side of the visual barrier (can no longer see you) Give them a treat... This helps the dog to learn not that not being able to “see” you is ok and can even be rewarding – But it is all under their own control so not frightening...
It’s just a game!
You can add to this by noticing and giving a reward when they settle on the floor the other side of the sofa where they can’t see you but have chosen to be calm.
Reward any choice to be happy without being able to see you.
Playing games like these will all strengthen your dog’s confidence and independence.
Have a go for yourself and please do not leave it to the last few days you have together at home.
Start now.
Reshaping your dog’s brain takes a few weeks – they need consistent opportunities over several weeks to form new and positive associations with being left alone.
If you want even more GAMES to play with your dog - Check out my training page for a variety of online courses filled with games.
GAMES TEACH so much more than one thing at a time so just get playing!
All the best
Lydia